“Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together”

“Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together”

When things are difficult, I often find it is because I am heading in the wrong direction.

Maybe I am pushing too hard to make a relationship something more than it can be, maybe my expectations are not realistic for the work I have asked to be performed, maybe I just thought one way of doing things was better than another and I was wrong.

Being able to pivot, change course and accept that there are better paths available to us, can make us into a better boss, friend, colleague, partner and neighbour.

What have you needed to pivot on lately to find a better path?
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Beatrice’s Equality Day Dreams #3 – they just asked me what job I wanted!

“The leadership team called me into their management meeting and said there were 3 roles available and I could pick anyone of them! I mean that was a really hard decision”

Said no women ever!

Am I right ?

But wouldn’t it be awesome if it happened.

For this to occur, a management team would need to assess people on :

  • their work performed,
  • make hiring decisions as a group and in a transparent manner,
  • the company would be in a high growth phase and have lots of new roles on offer,
  • the culture would be open and inclusive (not paternal and closed),
  • individual choice would be valued and there would be a lack of a reward systems in place for people feeling ‘owed’ positions (I’m not sure what the opposite of that be – something like people progress and are rewarded on company wide performance and objective measures, maybe?)

Now I’d love to hear from you, would you love this to happen and (is it possible) has this ever happened to you ?

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Kindness is Free

Always assume some one is trying their best.   

This post is inspired by Brene Brown’s work on vulnerability – I love all of her books!!

Would love to hear your thoughts….

How would your perception of your boss, direct reports and colleagues change if you assumed they were trying their best ?

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One bad chapter does not mean your story is over

Don’t let a bad boss, a bad role or bad employer make you give up on your ambition!
Go for it anyway!
PS – and move on as quickly as possible, don’t linger in a bad role so long you lose your ambition or will to live.
PPS –  and if you have a bully for a boss, colleague or your direct reports are ganging up on you, just get the hell out of there and don’t look back!!
Now, I’d love to hear from you!
Have you ever had a ‘bad’ work experience and how did you overcome this?
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Beatrice’s Equality day dreams #2

“There is just no politics in this place and everyone just gets along. Its such a happy place to work!”

Daydream, delusional ?

 

Wouldn’t that be nice – no politics and everyone just super happy – peachy keen!

 

I’m not sure if a politics free workplace is possible but I think a low political zone is possible when a workplace has :

  • a high level of diversity
  • open and supportive culture
  • a culture of setting people up for success
  • confident leaders
  • a low amount of org change, job losses
  • high profit
  • incentives rewarded based on company performance
  • a single pay rate for each job role
  • managers are supported when managing out poor performers
  • lots of training in positive culture and behaviours
  • a simple set of values that are realistic for that industry
  • low amount of overtime performed
  • community focus
  • well run teams are rewarded and a heroes are not
  • a fun and consistent induction for new starters and a welcoming culture overall
  • a focus on healthy living and balance (i.e.:  healthy snacks are provided at training and morning tea’s, lunches are held where good quality food is provided)
  • there is not a big drinking culture in place
  • attrition is below 7%
  • people are treated as human beings
  • a low level of open plan working
  • new ideas are welcomed and encouraged

 

Now I’d love to hear from you, what is your equality fantasy ?
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I Got This!

May all your vibes say 'I got this'
May all your vibes say ‘I got this’

 

I love this quote because it is exactly the attitude I want to have each time I:
  • start a new role
  • take on a new project
  • start working for a new boss
  • ask for promotion
  • ask for $$$ – a pay rise, quote a salary to a recruiter
  • try following a recipe from a real recipe book

Why is it so HARD to have this vibe when doing new things and asking for new things (or cooking) ?

 

When do you become super confident or does this just never happen?

Now, I’d love to hear from you!
What are your tips for having a ‘got this’ attitude?
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Do you want to get a promotion ? Here’s how…

Asking for a promotion can be super scary.

Why?

Because you will be making it very clear and very public that you are ambitious, have career goals and are prepared to go for them.

This can feel and be very exposing.

This is your opportunity to showcase your skills and lay the foundation for career progression at your current employer.

Got for it!

And, to help you go for it, here is my tried and very personally tested advice for getting that promotion time and time again!

Be Clear On Your Ask

  • Know which roles you are interested in
  • Know how much money you want in the form of salary and incentives
  • Know your why – why are you the right person to be promoted, what are your skills and what do you have to offer (have your sales pitch ready)
  • Know what you want to achieve in the new role for your company, business area and yourself
  • Know how you would achieve these things
  • Also, have a list of any working arrangements that you need considered and accomodated in the new role (i.e.: work from home, start times, limits on travel, if any etc)

Know Who To Ask

In I’m Ready Now! I wrote about how to identify and influence the key decision makers.
Make sure you know who can make decisions on promotion (this is not always your boss) and when they can make these decisions.

Know When to Ask

Ask for promotion when :

  1. You have already talked through your business case with your immediate boss and any key decision makers
  2. Achieved any action items that were asked for as part of your business case discussion
  3. Have held a discussion on the value you can bring to the new role
  4. You have spoken and gained advice from at least 30% of the leadership team you want to belong to, and
  5. Made your work visible to that leadership team

Other great times to ask are :

  • when you’ve delivered a big win for your company
  • when a new job becomes available due to a re-org
  • when someone departs a role unexpectedly

What will you do if you get a YES?

Have a celebration plan in place and, have a business plan in place that you can pick up and run with in your new role.

Always make sure to celebrate a promotion (even it feels like something that should have happened ages ago) and appreciate yourself for the increase wealth, autonomy and freedom a new role will bring you both professionally and personally.

What will you do if you get a NO?

Have a ‘No’ plan in place and a timeframe for getting to YES already determined.

Don’t stay too long in a role going no where.

Only you can determine how long is ‘too long’.

By having a plan in place BEFORE your discussion you won’t get sidetracked by the knock to confidence that a NO can have.

This plan will increase your chances of keeping your career on track and seeing knock backs as bumps a long the road not road blocks

Now I’d love to hear from you!
What is the best tip you’ve ever received for getting ahead and getting that promotion ?
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There’s bravery in being soft

There's bravery in being soft
There’s bravery in being soft

 

The one thing I’ve found that’s helped me feel happier and (mentally) healthier in the workplace, is sticking to my own style and not adopting others’ styles as my own.

Sometimes this is hard but I’ve realised that by sticking to my own style I’m a lot less drained, tired and grumpy.

I have a quiet voice and mostly a very feminine style. I like to be reserved when getting to know people and hear out other people’s ideas before speaking my own.

Sometimes I can be aggressive when I ‘know I’m right’ and other times I can be soft and quiet.

I just go with my own flow on things.  

I don’t speak over people, I like to take my time to consider all sides of a debate and I like to include everyone in a conversation (and I do get aggressive on letting quieter people into conversations and making sure everyone’s voice is heard.)

I can have a masculine side when I think I have solutions and can be very adamant at times (you know, when I’m right).

I’m happy with these contradictions because its easier being myself than trying to be perfectly consistent and even tempered all the time.

Do you agree?

Does it take bravery to be soft, yourself and stay in your truth at work?

 

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Beatrice’s Equality Day Dreams #1

"He just walked up and asked if I wanted to attend a promotion interview! "
“He just walked up and asked if I wanted to attend a promotion interview! “

He just walked up and asked if I wanted to attend a promotion interview!

Sometimes I like to fantasise about (well many fun things) but often about what the world would be like if we had true and complete equality today.

Can you imagine it ?

I try to and above is the line I’d love to hear from a talented colleague.

Why does this just not happen ?

The one thing that you hear about women (and I would apply this to quieter men as well) is that they have to ‘put their hand up‘.  Like we’re in grade 6 and want a turn at using the new MACINTOSH COMPUTER (oops showing my age – we had one MAC for a class of 30! I have odd memories of us all fighting over who got to wheel it out of the ‘computer cupboard’ into the classroom and back).

Putting your hand up is not bad advice.

You do need to ask for promotion, make it known that you want one and visibly work towards it.  But this also means that people who are extroverted, brash, over-confident are more likely to get promoted over more conscientious types. (My grade 6 report definitely said ‘Beatrice is a very a conscientious student’ or in other words quiet and introverted.)

I’m a big fan of seeking out talent and pushing people forward.

I don’t think everyone should have to yell and scream to get noticed and there would be a hell of a lot more good women and men in more senior roles if the men (and the rare super woman) in powerful positions took this approach.

Now I’d love to hear from you, what is your equality fantasy ?

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Breathe it all in, love it all out

Breathe it all in, love it all out
Breathe it all in, love it all out

I was once at a student conference where during a heated vote someone said “In with ANGER out with LOVE!!” in an exasperated slightly huffy manner, complete with eyeroll.  I’m not sure if she was trying to calm herself down or order the others around us to do so.  Anyway, it didn’t work! The vote was tight and there’s nothing like being 21 years old and ‘believing’ to make for a tense night on the floor of a national students conference.

Ahh memories, back in the ‘real world’ of work, I find myself sometimes thinking of this moment (ok, often a lot), when everyone around me is ‘battling’ hard and arguing their case on what a process document should be called or how to describe a ‘problem’ without using the word problem itself (challenge/opportunity/moment of clarity etc) when it all seems a bit ridiculous.  But I’m a fan of passion and I have definitely fought hard on getting directives re-worded from ‘you have to do this’ to ‘lets all work together on this’. Language is important after all.  So I get it, mostly.

There are of course moments when we (I) lose complete perspective.

Sometimes its that feeling you get when you are talked over again for the 1000th time that day, or when you talk through a presentation and get asked to make it ‘pretty’, or when you provide a report and get asked to add in sentences that are already in it (grrrr).

No one is perfect. Bosses aren’t perfect, colleagues aren’t perfect, you and I are not perfect.  So sometimes I think of the quote above and think today I’m just going to love everyone and everything because its better than hating, picking and moaning.

Now I’d love to hear from you!

How do you deal with perfectionism?

Do you expect everyone around you and yourself to be perfect?

And, how do you find ways to dial down the impact of this thinking on your life?

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